We are unashamed in our pursuit of having a marriage full of more laughter and spontaneity; gratitude and respect. We want to be the kind of couple that doesn’t stop at passively dreaming of a strong marriage but moves in action in our reach for one.
When David and I are in sync — It’s beautiful!
The sad truth is that despite our commitment and affection for each other, our marriage isn’t exactly the high water mark. I’m not saying that from a place of shame because when we look around we see very few marriages that we would want to imitate.
David and I are a couple of people who love each other and hurt each other on a regular basis. I am more selfish and impatient than I’d like, he’s more edgy and perfectionistic than he’d like. But other than the times when we are at each other’s throat, we have a solid, loving marriage.
So what’s the point in putting so much effort into doing this silly little experiment?
WE KNOW THERE IS MORE!
Strong Marriage Challenge Day 2 – I Have a Dream
We realize If we want a great marriage we have to be intentional about making it great. First, we have to identify what “great” means to us, so our very first action together was to DREAM.
We asked ourselves what exactly it is that we want to result from this covenant we have made with each another 14 years ago. We challenged ourselves to dream about what is possible for our life together and write those seemingly unattainable dreams down.
There is something about seeing dreams written out that makes them feel like they’re within reach.
A few of mine are:
- I want every last bit of love, intimacy, and friendship that God would allow a man and his wife to share.
- I want to appreciate each other and our unique gifts and quirks more.
- I want to have the kind of marriage our children will want to emulate when they get married.
A little pie in the sky, right?! Any big goal seems that way at first, that’s why in goal setting you always want to identify your main goal then work backward. What kind of marriage would David and I need to have for it to be one that our children would want to emulate?
During the course of the experiment, we’ll be talking about these things so that we can set more incremental, specific goals that’ll take us there over time. Day 21’s Challenge will tie it all together.
We have a long way to go for that!
We are, however, willing to do what it takes to run the race toward the finish line of our dream for more grace, joy, passion, vision and love inside of our marriage.
Let’s raise the bar for what we believe is possible. Let’s fight for more intimacy; More humility; More laughter; More connectedness.
Just because we may not know many deeply fulfilling, fun marriages doesn’t mean we shouldn’t have a vision for our own to be everything we dream it can be. Our lives with one another can (and should) absolutely ROCK!
It’s worth the effort … I know it is!
TAKE ACTION: Take time to get alone and think about what you really want out of our marriage. Dream big. If you feel like your deepest longings are out of reach, don’t allow shame or fear to creep in. You may even feel unsafe sharing your biggest hopes with your spouse. That’s okay. Make two lists. One for your eyes only that you can work towards and pray over on your own (and perhaps divulge down the road) and another to share. Marriage is messy. Don’t pressure yourself or your spouse to be lightyears from where you are overnight. Investment into your relationship takes time, but it will pay off in the long run! If you haven’t already and you are serious about strengthening your relationships please join the join the LUVolution.
